So NLP is looking a lot at learning, how habits work but also how habits “unwork”. You might have a bad habit like smoking or gambling where you go through a pattern and you need to rewrite your internal coding, e.g. going back to question why you doing something and then relearn a new pattern to improve the overall process. Time line therapy, often used with NLP, is helping to reframe certain experiences.
Does that make sense? Similar to understanding your inner needs, you might have to dig down deep to understand your motivation or habit. So whenever you learned a certain process, be unconsciously aware of ‘how to smoke’, you work the steps backwards. We cover some questioning techniques around that further on.
A simple exercise is reframing where you reframe a situation or a fear or an association by picturing it. You picture it, change the colour of the picture in your mind to be colourful, black and white, bigger and smaller until you are comfortable with that picture which also associates your feelings with it. So for instance if you are afraid of dogs you can picture them in a big colourful picture but then you might want to make it smaller and see how your feelings change. Or you want to change the picture to black and white or from a barking dog to a puppy. Experiment with it until you feel comfortable with a situation.
Role play for instance can help also if you are dealing with fear. Making the person you are working with aware of the actual situation, taking on the other person’s role, or the dog in case of fear of dogs.
NLP for me is a bit like playing with your mind and motivation. Anything you enjoy or do not enjoy is in your mind and, funnily enough, you are the one controlling your mind. So you are the one deciding how you feel. Remember the exercise I used before, smile and try to think negative, it is not going to work!
When reframing a situation, there are techniques like time line therapy where you move, usually with the help of a practitioner, along a timeline and change (traumatic) past experience. You can also walk through a SWOT (strength, weaknesses, opportunities, threats), or FADS (fear, angst, safety, development) analysis.
When I say walk, I mean to put signs onto the floor and walk through a situation physically, again connecting your body with your feelings, and then change the associations with it. It is what some refer to as anchoring. If you associate a physical connection with a state of mind, e.g. someone pressing your right shoulder making you smile, then every time someone presses your shoulder you will smile! Sounds crazy? It works. Read up on how to do it and try it.
You can anchor quite a lot of feelings and over time can make you laugh or cry by triggering a certain pressure point for instance.
Hopefully this makes you more curious of what is there to come and understand more of what you can do with NLP. Off to the questions next week.
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